Feeling forecast ahead of winter

Emu by Birdsville Track. (Supplied: Paul Taylor)
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A hot Australia Day and the recent warm weather has me thinking we are in for a wet winter. I base this forecast on nothing but a feeling that to get a wet winter we need it triggered by a hot summer.

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My scientific theory is based on nothing but my own personal opinion, nothing to do with the Indian Ocean Dipole or ants walking backwards up a tree on the western side.

Meanwhile, the Bureau of Meteorology has forecast southern Australia to expect rainfall in the typical range for February to April. I guess that means average rainfall for now.

This week’s ‘What bird is that?’ with Paul Taylor features Australia’s national bird, the emu,

which reminded me of this story:

A retired Aussie truck driver walks into a country pub with an emu. Let’s call him Dick, because that was his name. The barman asks them for their orders.

Dick says, “A hamburger, chips and a beer please,” and turns to his offsider, “I’ll have the same,” says the emu. A short time later the barman returns with the order.

“That’ll be $27.40 please.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment.

The next day they return, and Dick orders a hamburger, chips and a beer, and the emu says, “Great I’ll have the same.” Again, Dick reaches into his pocket and pays with the exact change.

This becomes routine until the two enter again. “The usual?” asks the barman. “No, it’s Friday night, so I’ll have a steak, chips, salad, and a Bundy and coke,” says Dick.

“Same,” says the emu. The barman brings the order and says, “That will be $78.70.” Once again Dick pulls the exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The barman cannot contain his curiosity any longer.

“Excuse me mate, but how do you manage to come up with the exact change in your pocket every time?”

“Well mate, a few years ago I was travelling across the Nullarbor when I blew a tyre. Alongside where I pulled up, I found an old lamp.

“So, naturally, I rubbed it, and a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.”

“That’s brilliant!” says the bartender. “Most people would ask for a million dollars or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”

“That’s right. Whether it’s a litre of milk or a Toyota Landcruiser, the exact amount is always there,” Dick replied.

The bartender pauses and suddenly blurts out, “So what’s with the bloody emu?”

Dick sighs, pauses, and answers, “My second wish was for a tall bird with a big arse and long legs who agrees with everything I say.”

What bird is that? by Paul Taylor

EMUS

With recent celebrations for Australia Day, it is only right to write about Australia’s national bird, the emu. Well known to everyone, an emu features on our Commonwealth Coat of Arms opposite the kangaroo.

This can be seen with anything to do with the Federal Government, or by simply looking at a 50 cent piece. Emus are endemic to Australia and are generally found over most of the continent.

They are numerous on the pastoral, inland plains of WA, NSW, Queensland and SA. They can also be seen in mallee and woodland, and

coastal areas like the Coorong.

More locally, emus occur from Orroroo south to Burra, and east of the ranges out from Eudunda. There are also some at the bottom end of Yorke Peninsula.

The emu is the biggest Australian bird. It cannot fly, but runs well, bouncing along at nearly 50 kph. Emus are also surprisingly good at swimming.

They are normally shy, but often curious. They can approach people in stopped vehicles and investigate unusual objects. Both male and female have bare blue and black skin on their head and neck.

Breeding is an interesting process. The female (of course) lays five to a dozen dark green eggs. Some clutches of about 20 eggs have been found, and these are likely due to another female adding more eggs.

After laying, the female leaves, with only the male incubating the eggs for 60 days before hatching. Emu chicks have brown and white stripes for the first three months.

It is just the male looking after these and he continues to mind the young ones for at least another year.

Agriculturally, Emus have been known to cause some damage to fences and crops, although now they are generally absent from cropping areas. For a time, last century, the WA Government placed a bounty on Emus of one shilling per head.

Emu farming is a small industry, although it has declined in recent years. The various products farmed are meat, oil, skin, eggs and feathers.

But the best place for Emus is in the Australian bush and outback. It is good to see a mob (their collective noun), and especially if it is “Dad with the kids.”

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